# Pathetic encounters of the Gorky variety

1. Kentish Town Forum, London, September/ October 1996
Pre gig. Whilst in the queue they walked nonchalantly through the stage door in a gesture that was entirely missed by almost everyone as no one knew who they were, although, in the strictest sense of the word this can't be classified as a genuine meeting. I just looked at them and smiled in a kind of I Know Who You Are And You're Famous, (sort of), type way after having seen them a week or two before.
2. De Montfort Hall, Leicester, October 1996
They were supporting the Manics who I like just a bit too and me, Alice and Liz, were waiting around at the back of the building after successfully convincing the security that everyone had fucked off and that they could go home, for the Manics just so we could stutter at them and look really stupid in a way that can't be explained adequately to anyone who doesn't love them on a similarly, entirely over the top, ridiculous considering we don't know them, manner and spend all of their seventeen year old days dreaming about meeting them and having a conversation with any one of Cod's four guises, except in this instance there were three.
Whatever.
Anyway, John, Euros and Euros R all came out really pissed. I don't know where Megan and Richard were. And my friends asked them for their autographs. I didn't because I was overcome with fear and displayed the type of self restraint that I rarely show now.
And then regretted it. A lot.
But Euros offered us all a buy of the boiled sweet variety, complete with square plastic wrapper around the top and we all said thankyou very much and they stumbled off, I gave mine to Alice as it had gelatine in it, then we made fools of ourselves in front of Messrs. Wire, Bradfield and Moore.
3. In Bristol at The Fleece, Halloween, 1996
I can be sure of this date as I was wearing a set of luminous teeth until I bit them in half.

Part a) Pre gig. Me and my trusty cohort Richard, otherwise known as my gigging buddy, misread the ticket. We thought, somehow, it said 'doors 7.30'. It infact said 9.30 as we discovered when we got to Bristol two hours early, leaving time to find the place as neither of us knew Bristol well. The Fleece wasn't open. The pub next door was, so we went in and drank coke and played pool three times, where I won twice, an amazing feat considering Rich plays weekly, and generally got very bored and cursed our stupidity and 'keener' style natures towards all things music that we like. Gradually, after about three hours, more people came into the pub and the place became fairly full and then it happened. Gorky's walked through the door
mingled with their Welsh speaking friends and roadies and the pub was heaving. They hadn't had their tea as their van had broke down which was why they were all so late so they ordered various things accompanied with the standard British limp salad of ice berg, a slice of cucumber, a quarter of a tomato and a bit of cress, and chips and looked around for an empty table, but there were none. So we said they could sit at our table and they said "och thankyou very much" in the way that polite people do and ate their dinner and talked in Welsh most of the time so we didn't understand it, but I chipped in with a feeble thankyou for the lolly Euros and he didn't know what the hell I was talking about ("We'd had a few that night" was offered in explanation) and we cleared off after finishing our drinks because we didn't like to impose.

part b) Pre gig, but inside the venue. On going into the toilet I saw Megan washing her hands and she smiled, WITH RECOGNITION, at me, a feat not all that remarkable considering we had just been sat next to each other.
part c) Post gig. Rich and I were waiting on a lift from my lovely friend George who felt guilty about not being able to come so promised to pick us up to make up for it in a typically warped George kind of way so we naturally took her up on the offer, my mum having point blank refused earlier. George didn't finish work until 11.45 so we had time to kill as the gig ended at eleven. Everyone filed out of the room leaving about 20 people, most of whom knew, or were involved with, various members of the band, and us. Right, I thought, I shan't let another opportunity to get their autographs slip through my fingers, so after about twenty minutes of hiding in a corner thinking I Can't Possibly I went and asked Euros and he said yeah, yeh of course and obliged and then offered to take me backstage and get the rest of the band to sign it too so I followed him. And then said incident with the apple occurred. And then all the rest of them signed my issue of NME which happened to be opened on a GZM interview and I was very happy. Richard (James, not my friend) asked me if I liked Everret True's style of writing and said he did And I said I didn't think I'd read anything by him before. And then felt stupid because I had and I do and I didn't know why I had just lied. And later when we were waiting by the door looking out for Georgio John was trying to put his trombone away only he couldn't get it undone so he asked Rich to hold one end of it and pulled and they both went very red in the face with the effort and it took ages, and I offered the use of my lipsalve as a form of lubricant and John said no and I felt stupid and then we left because George had arrived but it was ok because I was on a high still because I'd got all of their autographs and had an apple and spoken to Trisha and Steve from Broadcast for most of the night who were extremely lovely and helped them carry their guitars out to their transit van in the rain after they'd finished playing.
4. I think I need to start abbreviating these as this is getting incredibly long, probably tedious for you reading if you haven't given up, painful to my arms, and coffee cups are beginning to fall on the floor as I have no more table space left. I don't really have much more to say, except for two occasions. All the other times I have seen Gorky's, except for last time, I have seen them before hand and Euros has always acknowledged my presence and said hello and asked how I was in a very touching manner. When this happened at the Bierkeller I was most chuffed as I hadn't seen them in a while and he recognised me and asked how I was before I'd said anything at all. Actually, I lie. I did see three out of five of Gorky's at Dingwalls but Euros was not amongst them and he's the only one who's ever talked to me really.
Another time I saw Euros and Megan at a Super Furry Animals gig in the audience and couldn't convince the people I was with that it was them, but anyway, I didn't get a chance to say hello (which would have been roughly all I would have said as it's not like I exactly know them) as they were with their friends (or rather Euros had his tongue down his ones throat) and I was with mine, so we beat a hasty retreat.
5. Ok, next occasion proper. I went to see Gorky's at the Astoria- the bill having the added advantages of Broadcast (Yeay. Want to see them now aswell) and Mogwai. I bumped into Euros in the audience for Pavement, who I failed to mention were headlining as I don't like them, when me and Rich were pushing our way out after tiring of moshing for the sake of it. I then made a complete tit of myself. We exchanged the usual hellos and I asked if Euros Rowlands was related to Rheinalt H. Rowlands. Doh. (I'd just like to point out this was because Rheinalt appears In the credits on Bwyd Time and not purely because he comes form Wales and they share the same surname)
Euros laughed and said "och no no no" and then laughed again and the crowd moved around us and we were gone. I then got home the next day and actually bothered to read the back of "Buckowski" and found "the mythological Rheinalt H. Rowlands..." and felt very stupid indeed.
6. And yes this really is the last one, I was at a Melys gig down the road from me, (because I'm all grown up now and have moved out of home and live right in the centre of Bristol), with my friend Tasha and ALL of Gorky's walked through the door and whilst I was busy telling the ignorant Miss. Alden the identities of the new arrivals and thinking How Sweet, They Genuinely Are Friends And Go Out Together As A Group, Euros smiled at me and nodded and I was most pleased. I think Tasha may describe it more as a kind of smugness, but either way I was very happy. Easily impressed you see. And then after Melys had played a stonking set and we were coming down the stairs running from the dreadful noise that is Campag Velocet I bumped into Euros and we exchanged slaggings about the aforementioned band and I asked when Gorky's were next on tour and he said hang on a minute and gave me a piece of yellow post- it paper that I photocopied just so you can see how sad I am~that is stuck in pride of place on my cupboard door next to a Neon Space Dog set list seeing as I can't get a Gorky's one.
So, there you go- a little insight into my pathetic Gorky's groupie lifestyle, only I've just remembered that groupies are meant to sleep with the band, so I take it back. I'm not even that.

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